* 12:36 AM February 15, 2012
... TO HAVE 25% LESS SODIUM. Why do you think people buy condensed soup in the first place? Because salt is delicious. Might as well have said "25% less tasty warmth in your belly", or "25% less childhood memories". I'm sorry, but my mom did not raise me on goldfish crackers swimming in noodle water.
Valentine's Day is over again, and I still stand by my advice to be confident. Trust me, those sad statuses telling the world that you "don't need no man to make me happy" will not get you a date. If you're gonna be sassy on Valentine's Day, tell it to your bottle of wine, not Facebook.
You know what upsets me this year? The lonely, sad people who used to spread their misery all over Facebook-- who now have boyfriends/girlfriends-- who you'd hope would cut back on the sassing-- have now found new things to sass about! Equally stupid subjects with equally stupid opinions attached! It's like they've been practicing this whole time for D day to come where they blow up my news feed with sass loaded crap that leaks pathetic puppies.
Yet, I'm grateful...? ish...
It has been six months since my last blog post, World. And I'm supposed to reflect on how I've changed in the past year seeing as it's the two year mark... but I'm not going to because it's just depressing. And you know that the only depressing lives I like to focus on are yours.
What I can say is that I still retain my awesomeness (duh) and that I almost miss the uterusless cat and her space cone.
Love, Me
P.S. I looked it up, and Campbell's still makes the good stuff.
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